This old money pit

Every time I visit my family I usually feel like an alien visiting from another planet as they have 2 enthusiasms I don't share; children and home improvement. Modern science has made it easy to avoid the first but home improvement caught up with me over the past two weeks since the house painters are going to leave me bankrupt and I have a limited time to get the house ready for sale.

The only reason I bought this house instead of renting was due to my having a large dog which made it nearly impossible to rent in Cambridge and it was cheaper to buy in the long-term. Over the past few years I have tried in vain to hire contractors to do various jobs around the house and I think I have finally found the secret to getting one to return your calls; tell them you are selling your house. They hear the 'ca-ching' sound right over the telephone wire when you mention this tiny detail and call you right back. Not only do they hike up the prices on this sort of job, they don't have any long lasting accountability for the job thus making it the ideal job for maximizing profit.

Since the painters are going to take as much of my cash flow as they can I took a week off of work and have done several of my lifetimes worth of home improvement in less than a fortnight.

Painting

All of my dislike and general misanthropic tendancies are fed by the cheap and the stupid. There is nothing, and I do mean nothing, more aggravating than giving woodwork that has already been painted, a crime in its own right, a fresh coat of paint only to find the motherfuckers before you painted a single coat of water-based latex paint without primer over oil paint. To the uninitiated this seems harmless but consider what oil and water do in a container; they separate don't they? I would like to sentence these idiots to an eternity of painting a house which has walls that chip and peel since the latex paint won't ever adhere properly.

Unless you plan to die in the house you currently own, don't paint small and dark rooms deep colours. The dining room in my house was painted a deep, dark navy blue which I renamed "What in the fuck were they thinking" blue or WITFWTTB. It required 3 coats of primer followed by 2-3 coats of linen white to cover it. It's amazing how different and how much larger the room looks with lighter paint. Instead of being the light-sucking WITFWTTB hole, it exudes light and shows off the natural woodwork they had refinished and then slopped WITFWTTB on the edges. For the crime of painting dark colours in a small, dark room I sentence these people to an eternity in a dark cave while painting it with WITFWTTB.

Bathroom tile

Grout isn't waterproof. We can land on the moon but we still use grout on tile which is meant to be innundated frequently with water. Somehow this seems unfair. At some point during the 70s the bathroom was remodeled and hasn't really been touched since. A coat of latex over oil paint was about the only thing the previous owners had been able to manage.

The bathroom tile was, fortunately, mostly good but the grout was going and 6 tiles buckled from the wall a while back. I caulked the crap out of them thinking that maybe I could get a contractor in to fix them but that never happened. So I removed the nasty looking caulk, pulled off the buckled tiles and cleaned them up and restuck them to the wall. This sounds easier than it is as the margin for error is very, very small so getting them to fit perfectly where they were requires patience, patience and more patience. A putty knife and a rubber mallet help a bit too. Once the mastic is applied you have to let it cure for 24 hours. Then take a grout tool to remove the old, loose stuff and hoover the dust so the new grout will stick. Applying grout isn't rocket science but it is a refined and distilled pain in the ass. You have to work with a substance that dries quickly yet washes away with water before it sets. This means you have to use the float to apply it to the tiles and squeegee it off before it sets while being careful to not wash off the newly applied grout.

The grout then has to set for 24-48 hours and sealed with a silicone grout sealer which also has to cure for 24 hours. Do not try to hurry this process out of the need to bathe. Enjoy how rank you smell and think of how good that shower is going to feel after 5 days when the tile is ready! :)

The finishing touch is caulking around the tub and in the corners. Practice with the caulk gun before you do this as a) bath and tub caulk is some seriously sticky shit that even acetone will not remove and b) it's really hard to get a nice even bead of caulk. Keep a razor blade widget around for the inevitable need to remove bits of it once it has dried in 24 hours or so.

Painting the outside of the house

I had to go next-door to ask the neighbour if the painters could use his driveway for their ladders since one side of the house abuts his property. He agreed then started telling me in his thick Irish accent about how "that house has never held a coat of paint". I pointed out that the house had only been painted by cheap bastards without a primer over the last 30 or more years but that didn't seem to convince him that this paint job would be any different than those that came before. I had to resist the urge to smack him and hoped that I could at least feel like I was making an earnest attempt at having a quality paint job applied to the house. They've replaced a large number of the cedar shingles and are scraping every inch by hand since power sanding isn't allowed in this town. They are also going to scrape, glaze and paint the old windows too. That sucking sound you hear? That's the sound of my bank account being emptied.

What's left

While I really love my manicure of broken fingernails from the solvents and a combination of grout, caulk, white paint and primer as nail polish, I'll be thrilled to be done with the home improvement phase of moving. I'm even looking forward to going back to work.

I still have to touch up the woodwork in the sunroom since, like all the rest of the painted wood baseboards in the house, the guy who refinished the floors slopped polyurethane on most of them making them look gross. The contents of the basement need to be moved out to the garage for the moving sale extraveganza. I may paint down the stairs to the basement but, at this point, I may just say fuck it and leave something for the new owners to do when they're bored. I'm about to hire a handyman to fix one of the garage door springs, fill cracks in the foundation with hydraulic cement, replace one of the wooden steps on the side entrance and whatever else is left that needs fixing.

In conclusion I think that people who dig Bob Vila and his kind are part of an alien conspiracy, though to what end I've not yet determined. To be sure to get a ring back from a contractor just mention the magic words, "I'm Moving". I guarantee that phrase will work like a charm or your money back. Owning a home is pain in the ass, especially if you aren't Bob Vila with his workshop filled with tools and buddies who are professional contractors.

On the bright side at least I'll have something to talk about at Christmas when my sisters start yammering on about the stuff they've fixed in their homes over the past year. Hmmm, nah, I'll just get loaded on wine and talk about our new apartment/condo in downtown Helsinki with a resident handyman :)

permalink Ω 28 September 2002, Helsinki

the mostly cloudy soon-to-be expatriot

Sarah Vowell has a brilliant new book out titled The Partly Cloudy Patriot in which she articulates much of my own feelings about the US that I could not say as well. I have always eschewed patriotism since it has so often been the source of problems all over the world. We like to give a lot of lip service to being one big happy global family yet still draw geographic and ethnic borders.

After 9/11, there was little room for those of us who weren't ready or willing start waving the flag or exclaim 'god bless america' at every turn. Sarah Vowell expresses my own feelings, suspicions and trepidations so eloquently that I find it reassuring to know someone else feels the way I do.

Immediately after the attack, seeing the flag all over the place was moving, endearing. So when the newspaper I subscribe to published a full-page, full-color flag to clip out and hang in the window, how come I couldn't? It took me a while to figure out why I guiltily slid the flag into the recycling bin instead of taping it up. The meaning had changed; or let's say it changed back. In the first day or two the flags were plastered everywhere, seeing them was heartening because they indicated that we're all in this sorrow together. The flags were purely emotional. Once we went to war, once the president announced that we were going to retaliate against the "evildoers," then the flag again represented what it usually represents, the government. I think that's when the flags started making me nervous. The true American patriot is by definition skeptical of the government. Skepticism of the government was actually one of the platforms the current figurehead of the government ran on. How many times in the campaign di d President Bush proclaim of his opponent, the then vice president, "He trusts the federal government and I trust the people"? This deep suspicion of Washington is one of the most American emotions an American can have. So by the beginning of October, the ubiquity of the flag came to feel like peer pressure to always stand behind policies one might not necessarily agree with. And, like any normal citizen, I prefer to make up my mind about the issues of the day on a case by case basis at 3:00 A.M. when I wake up from my Nightline-inspired nightmares.

....

I will say that, in September, atheism was a lonely creed. Not because atheists have no god to turn to, but because everyone else forgot about us. At a televised interfaith memorial service at Yankee Stadium on September 23, Muslim, Christian, Jewish, Sikh, and Hindu clerics spoke to their fellow worshipers. Placido Domingo sang "Ave Maria" for the mayor. I waited in vain for someone like me to stand up and say that the only thing those of us who don't believe in god have to believe in is other people and that New Yrok City is the best place ther ever was for a godless person to practise her moral code.

I found all of the essays in The Partly Cloudy Patriot to be witty, insightful and, at times, very amusing. I encourage anyone else who may feel similarly to go get a copy as she somehow makes it agreeable to be an American in spite of these being trying times, even for a soon-to-be expatriot :)

permalink Ω 24 September 2002, Helsinki

The importance of being glass

Glass has always been a fascinating substance. Its chemical properties alone have sparked liquid vs. solid debates for ages. The chemistry behind the colours in glass is a science as well as an art unto itself. Gold is used for imbuing glass with a bright red hue but too much or too little heat can lead to what glass artists refer to as 'baby shit brown'. We use glass in so many things that we take it for granted that it has always been around. Sure, Halfpint on Little House on the Prairie waited years for Pa to get a window installed since glass was expensive and scarce but where did glass come from?

Glass: A World History is a new book on the history of the substance we take for granted.

permalink Ω 22 September 2002, Helsinki

Synergy archive

There is a new Dot-bomb Business Plan Archive that is collecting business plans for posterity to learn from and possibly explain how so many utterly stupid ideas managed to get funding.

permalink Ω 22 September 2002, Helsinki

Not actual size

It would appear that other companies are catching on to Apple's style mantra that technology doesn't have to be ugly and boring to be functional. I have no need for hubzilla but I want one anyway just because it looks so cool. It's a brilliant melding of form and function which gives me hope that other technology manufacturers will follow suit thus making the beige square box a thing of the past.

permalink Ω 18 September 2002, Helsinki

Yes, I am an agent of Satan

I was cleaning out my inbox today and ran across this list of things I'd love to say during our weekly teleconferences. I don't know where the list comes from but whomever wrote it must inhabit the dilbert zone like I do.

1. I can see your point, but I still think you're full of it.
2. I don't know what your problem is, but I'll bet it's hard to pronounce.
3. How about never? Is never good for you?
4. I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in publi c. This is good!
5. I'm really easy to get along with once you people learn to see it my wa y.
6. I'll try being nicer if you'll try being smarter.
7. I'm out of my mind, but feel free to leave a message.
8. I don't work here. I'm a consultant.
9. It sounds like English, but I can't understand a word you're saying.
10. Ahhh ... I see the screw-up fairy has visited us again.
11. I like you. You remind me of when I was young and stupid.
12. You are validating my inherent mistrust of strangers.
13. I have plenty of talent and vision. I just don't give a damn.
14. I'm already visualizing the duct tape over your mouth.
15. Thank you. We're all refreshed and challenged by your unique point of v iew.
16. Any connection between your reality and mine is purely coincidental.
17. What am I? Flypaper for freaks!?
18. I'm not being rude. You're just insignificant.
19. It's a thankless job, but I've got a lot of karma to burn off.
20. Yes, I am an agent of Satan, but my duties are largely ceremonial.
21. Do I look like a people person?
22. This isn't an office. It's Hell with fluorescent lighting.
23. I started out with nothing and still have most of it left.
24. Sarcasm is just one more service we offer.
25. I'm trying to imagine you with a personality.
26. A cubicle is just a padded cell without a door.
27. Can I trade this job for what's behind door number one?
28. Too many freaks, not enough circuses.
29. Chaos, panic and disorder -- my work here is done.
30. How do I set a laser printer to stun?

permalink Ω 17 September 2002, Helsinki

hfb the toilet slayer

For the past few years I have considered getting a plumber cum exorcist for much of the plumbing in my house, especially the toilet, as I suspect that in some way it is sentient and evil.

The main drain pipe in the house developed a golf ball size hole at the trap last year the night before we were to leave for Helsinki. Finding a plumber to return my desperate pleas for help was futile and I wound up fixing it myself with a gob of plumbers epoxy. I try not to look in the direction of that pipe with the hope that left untaunted it will leave me alone.

The toilet likes to do several things; leak from the rusted tank bolts, drop the flapper chain, lose the seal on the flapper, and run when the shower is on when the fill tube slips below the fill line. Pick any random day of the week and usually one of these things will be wrong. Friday, the tank bolts decided to leak again. My usual tactic of adding a little waterproof sealant to the bolts didn't do the job so I vowed to fix the problem once and for all. I had taken the day off to begin the fun task of painting 2 of the upstairs bedrooms and didn't really think about what tackling the evil toilet would really entail.

The tank bolts had not been disturbed for 30 years and were rusted to the point of no regular removal. Jarkko valiantly got the tank itself off by sawing through the bolts underneath the tank but there were nuts under the tank that prevented the remains of the bolts from coming off the toilet base. Undaunted and determined to vanquish the possessed commode I bought a few metal cutting discs for the dremel and started grinding away. I had about 5mm of clearance between the porcelain and the bottom of the nut that I had to hold with a pair of pliers in one hand and the dremel buzzing at 20k rpm in the other. An hour later they were removed and 15 minutes after that the toilet was back together with new bolts and seals.

Of course, the toilet was very angry that it had been deprived of its favourite amusement so the flapper then decided to give up the seal. The toilet made a gross misjudgement in thinking it could taunt me so. I went downstairs and got a gob of plumbers epoxy, drained the tank and stuck that sucker on for good. I even fixed the chain and the fill tube at the same time.

Now the toilet is bored and I flush with confidence that the toilet isn't going to explode into a fountain. But I'm sure it's up to something and will try to amuse itself with some other plumbing malady but me, my dremel and plumbers epoxy can fix most anything.

I can't wait to be an apartment dweller again.

permalink Ω 17 September 2002, Helsinki

When good type goes bad

It should, of course, read megaflicks.....

permalink Ω 17 September 2002, Helsinki

Cheech and Chong would dig this

When I was a chemistry student and had keys to the labs we would have fun parties and occasionally work out new ideas for the show we would do to get local high school students interested in chemistry. One of my favourite amusements was to dip the Green Hulk super strong bendy doll into liquid nitrogen then try to smash him with a mallet. Usually we were laughing more than the kids. The twinkie skits always got their attention though as we would show them a mass spec of the sponge cake and the filling then light one on fire that had been presoaked in ethanol.

I noticed today that of all the things we did to those twinkies we never thought of frying them. The Chip Shop apparently got tired of frying only fish and chips and branched out into frying candy bars and twinkies. I have always coveted deep-fryers since I would find endless hours of fascination in frying everything edible and anything else that might be cool to fry. I would go out and buy one today if we weren't moving soon.

So, if you have a deep-fryer and a box of twinkies, here's the recipe for making your own lard cake on a stick to help your cholesterol levels :) It just doesn't get more American than this.

Deep-Fried Twinkies

For Twinkies:

• 6 Twinkies
• Popsicle sticks
• 4 cups vegetable oil
• Flour for dusting

For batter:

• 1 cup flour
• 1 tablespoon malt vinegar
• 1 teaspoon baking powder
• 1 teaspoon salt
• 12 ounces water
• powdered sugar
• berry coulis

Chill or freeze Twinkies for several hours or overnight.

Heat 4 cups vegetable oil in deep fryer to about 375 degrees.

To make batter: Mix together all ingredients [ except the powdered sugar and berry coulis ] to a custard-like consistency. Refrigerate while oil heats.

Push stick into Twinkie lengthwise, leaving about 2 inches to use as a handle, dust with flour and dip into the batter. Rotate Twinkie until batter covers entire cake. Place carefully in hot oil. The Twinkie will float, so hold it under with a utensil to ensure even browing. Fry it for about 90 seconds, just until filling is starting to melt and outside is golden brown.

Remove Twinkie to paper towel and let drain. Slice on the bias. Serve on a pool of Four-Berry Coulis. Sprinkle with powdered sugar.

Four-Berry Coulis

Put equal amounts of frozen raspberries, blackberries, strawberries and blueberries into a pan on low heat with a tablespoon of sugar per cup of berries. When mixture begins to boil, remove from heat. Pour into blender. Blend until berries are crusted. Pour mixture through a sieve to remove seeds.

And we STILL don't know what ingredients are in twinkies.....

permalink Ω 12 September 2002, Helsinki

curbside appeal

One of the drawbacks to owning a home is the eventual need to sell it for a reasonably profitable amount of money. Selling a house in the depth of Winter isn't a terrific idea so I sent email to the Real Estate Agent who sold the house to me 6 years ago. If you ever want to know the dirt on your neighbours and the town you live in make friends with a local agent as I found out more in 30 minutes of chatting with Dawn than I have in 6 years.

This morning she came over with the market analysis and what price she thinks will be fair for our house. The house has nearly doubled in price and is supposedly a 'starter' home. I don't know what the average salary is these days in Boston but how does the half million dollar range qualify as a 'starter' home?! The seemingly impervious real estate market appears to be hitting a soft patch as well since the average number of days on the market has increased in the last 2 months so I'll be rather pensive until someone decides that it's the home of their dreams and are willing to purchase it.

Since the market is going a bit soft more stress is being placed on the condition the home is in before listing. Suddenly, every little ding, nick, loose doorknob and anything else out of place comes into sharp focus. The agent also recommended that the exterior be painted to increase the 'curbside appeal'. I guess cat5 cabling throughout the house doesn't do much for said appeal. :)

We've also started boxing up our library and collecting stuff for a garage sale to give the house that 'not quite so lived in' feeling. It makes me tired just thinking of all the stuff that needs to be done much less doing them.

If I survive the next three or so weeks and get everything done in time, all I have left to do is bake a loaf of bread for the open house to give it that 'homey' feeling. The psychological warfare in the act of baking bread or an apple pie is almost admirable if a bit manipulative. I wonder if we could have 2 open house tour groups, one control group and one subject to experiment, to test if those exposed to the scent of baking pies are inexplicably compelled to part with a large sum of money or if they suddenly feel hungry and speed off to the local deli for a sandwich. I'm guessing the latter :)

permalink Ω 12 September 2002, Helsinki

Herbie Rides Again

My first car was a bright yellow 1975 fuel-injected VW Beetle. I worshipped that car as it was my ticket to freedom from the suffocating suburbs.

It had personality, quirks and no heat but I adored it just the same. On really hot days I had to park it on an incline so that I could pop start it with the clutch after getting it rolling. Dad and I replaced the injectors a number of times though the most memorable time I had to drive up to the bank to get some money before they closed and on the way home I saw what looked like my father driving behind me. When I parked in the driveway, sure enough, it was Dad behind me leaping out of his car yelling "Shut it off! Shut it off!" Apparently, in the rush to get the injectors replaced we didn't get the seal on one of the gas lines tightly enough and it was spewing gas all over the magnesium block. :)

The floorboards on Bugs were notorious for rusting away and mine was no exception. Driving back from a college prank with a friend we were soaked when I drove through a rather large puddle on the highway which spewed water up into the car and she squeaked, "It's fucking Orca!". There were 2 inches of water on the floor of the car and we were drenched but I still giggle whenever I remember it.

In the winter I would freeze since the heat never really worked but years later I would find the hose that was supposed to carry heat into the interior of the car was never connected to the vents. I had vanity plates to express my love for my bright yellow love bug; amo id.

I am ruthlessly unsentimental about personal possessions but still I think of that car fondly and wish I could drive it again. You could see the bright yellow a mile away and hear the engine nearly as far. Even now I can tell the sound of an old VW Beetle before I lay eyes on the car itself. Perhaps it's because the car came of age with me or maybe it's because few cars have the sort of charm the VW Beetle has but the new Beetles just aren't the same.

The book Bug: The Strange Mutations of the World's Most Famous Automobile prompted my waxing nostalgia for my old bug. It explores the history of the Bug and delves into the cultural phenomenon it became. The SUV will be forgotten eventually but the Bug's charm and place in our memories will remain.

permalink Ω 9 September 2002, Helsinki

Let Freedom Read

September 21st through 28th is Banned Books Week. To raise awareness about censorship there are read-outs being planned around the country.

If large numbers of people believe in freedom of speech, there will be freedom of speech, even if the law forbids it. But if public opinion is sluggish, inconvenient minorities will be persecuted, even if laws exist to protect them. George Orwell

Celebrate by reading a banned book.

permalink Ω 9 September 2002, Helsinki

Give a hoot, don't pollute

I'd like to rant just a little for a moment about the overwhelming abundance of really crappy HTML. I recently validated my blogs for 4.01 strict HTML so that, theoretically, anyone with a browser from circa 1997 through the present should be able to view the pages as intended. Out of curiosity I attempted to validate about 100 or so random other blogs and only one came back valid, Textism.

Now, I loathe writing HTML nearly to the point of preferring a dental appointment but is it really that hard to write even remotely valid HTML? Not a single blogging tool seems to generate valid HTML though MT is closer than most. One rather popular blog spewed over 300 errors on the front page alone and I'm amazed that browsers are so amazingly forgiving and seem to encourage such lax practises.

Even Google gives people who sign up for their 'site search' feature a lump of completely invalid HTML to insert into their web pages. It's 15 lines! Couldn't they be bothered to make sure it was valid in some version of HTML? Their front page is riddled with errors after forcing the doc type, since the page doesn't declare it as it should, in HTML 2, 3.2, 4.01 and XHTML 1.0. It's a simple little web page with a text box and a few buttons and they couldn't be bothered to validate it after 5 years?! No wonder 'web designers' are making minimum wage down at Taco Bell.

So I would encourage the people who think that blogging is a 'revolution' to do something really revolutionary...VALIDATE YOUR HTML!

permalink Ω 7 September 2002, Helsinki

weird words

Word freaks will probably want to pick up a copy of Weird and Wonderful Words, fresh off the OUP press and written by the editor of Verbatim.

permalink Ω 7 September 2002, Helsinki

How do you say 'crazy' in Finnish?

So, the countdown to Finland has begun. I'm getting the house ready for sale and we've put a bid in for a house in downtown Helsinki. Yes, we are really leaving the US at the end of January for Helsinki with one way tickets :)

I have started Finn Man, a blog for my trials in learning the language and observations of just how weird Finland really is...or not. :) If you read it I can't guarantee that you'll be able to say Hietaniemi with any accuracy but maybe you'll want to come visit and bring me a case of cheeze-its and white castle burgers :)

permalink Ω 4 September 2002, Helsinki

Snapshot of a life

Noone ever takes a photograph of something they want to forget....

We went to see One Hour Photo the other night. It's Kubrick-esque in it's sparse yet meaning-laden detail while telling a story that could happen anywhere if you cared to look for it. Sy the photoguy is played by Robin Williams; a performance that will change the way you think about him. Sy is not some random psycho killer but an average guy with no family or friends alienated from society with only his job to provide him with some sense of purpose for his tiny little life lived in silent desperation....until he sees someone who seems to have everything he doesn't throw it all away. It's disturbing because we all know someone like Sy yet make little room in our lives for them.

It's an excellent film.

permalink Ω 2 September 2002, Helsinki

At Dot Mac Dot Com

After installing Jaguar on my iBook I went along with the suggestion to try using .Mac just to see what all the fuss about their charging for it was all about. It's not bad, really. I remembered that I had an old iTools account so I got a discount on the first year subscription which makes it even better. For $50 I get 100Mb on-line storage space, 15Mb mail queue which I can read from anywhere in the world via a web browser [ important since I may not have an internet connection at home for a few weeks when we arrive in Helsinki ], simple backup software and various other little things I doubt I'll use but...for $50 it's worth it to see if I'll use it enough to warrant resubscribing next year. GUI mail clients are just not my speed and it's a pity they can't embed mutt into the .mac mail web client :)

The web page creation tools are painful and I'll have to replace my experiment soon with something via BBEdit but I can see how someone who has no familiarity with the web might find them to be very useful getting started. The iCal features will also be very appealing.

Overall, Apple has done a very nice job with .Mac and I'm not really sure why people are making such a fuss about paying for the service especially since ISPs, what few are left after years of charging too little for their services, offer less for more money. For those who can make use of the services .Mac has to offer it's nearly a bargain.

permalink Ω 2 September 2002, Helsinki

Women in refrigerators

In Star Trek you could always tell who was going to wind up dead if they happened to be wearing the dreaded red uniform. Gail Simone published Women in Refrigerators suggesting that being female in comic books isn't a good indicator of longevity either. The list of characters and their fates is creepy considering the audience is largely male. I'd like to see a similar listing of male comic book characters and their fates to see if they are equally brutal.

permalink Ω 1 September 2002, Helsinki

Hnk if U luv txt msg 4 god

Ship of Fools Magazine sponsored a competition to rewrite the Lord's Prayer in 160 characters or less for mobile phone usage. The winner was:

No wonder kids can't spell these days. For people who use SMS and text paging frequently and like to send their friends bits from the bible you might be interested in the upcoming book, r father n hvn. The Repent! wristwatch also makes a lovely gift for all your closest sinner friends.

permalink Ω 1 September 2002, Helsinki

Ouside wants in too

Fans of John Mayer will be happy to see that he's re-releasing his first album Inside Wants Out. It contains several acoustic versions of songs on Room for Squares as well as some new songs.

permalink Ω 1 September 2002, Helsinki

Free as in upgrade

Just as everytime I finally decide to buy some new bit of electronics the purchase is soon followed by the announcement of a new and improved version so too was the Cateye OS 1.0 cyclocomputer. Cateye recently announced the new OS 1.1 cyclocomputer but they have offered to replace current OS 1.0 units with a new OS 1.1 for free. So, if you own one of these, read the following instructions on how to take them up on this generous offer.

OS 1.0 Upgrade - North America

Cat Eye is offering a free upgrade from the original OS 1.0 to the brand new OS 1.1. The new OS computer offers several improved features and even a new function.

Improved functions include:

• Sharper screen display
• Better date functions
• Improved weekly, monthly and yearly distance recording
• More stable Max Speed functioning
• Improved Microprocessor stability

Additional function:

• Countdown Distance or Countdown Time

The only thing you need to do to take advantage of this offer is to send the current OS 1.0 computer head to the Cat Eye Service Center in Boulder Colorado. ONLY the COMPUTER HEAD should be sent in. This is the only component that is being replaced. The bracket sensor and magnet should not be sent in. They are compatible for the new OS 1.1. Please note that a brand new computer head will be returned. It will have to be reformatted and there will be no data transferred to the new computer.

Shipping Instructions:

The computer head should be packaged in a bubble wrap envelope (or similar padded packaging) and shipped by UPS, FedEx or some other method that is insured and can be traced. Include your return address in the envelope and a daytime phone number and e-mail if available. Send the bubble wrap envelope to:

Cat Eye OS Upgrade
1705 14th Street #115
Boulder, Colorado 80302 USA

This upgrade should be processed within three working days and a new OS 1.1 computer head will be returned to you.

If you receive this message and are not in North America, please contact your local bike shop or d_griffith@cateye.co.jp for more details.

permalink Ω 1 September 2002, Helsinki