CNN is a Dirty Bomb

« If Finnish artists made missiles, I'd guess that this is what they'd look like; the Puuinen KKKK. Tall. Erect. Pointy. Wooden. Geometric. Stylish. »

I've been thinking about going home to see the family I've not seen for nearly 3 years, but the presidential election's circus-like slimefest and fear-mongering, like the 'nuclear terror' special CNN ran tonight, gives me a migraine at the thought of entering American airspace since I figure if I don't get bombed out of the sky or get trapped in the US if something like a dirty bomb did happen, I'd get the "Welcome to Gitmo" travel package from the US customs guards when I refuse the anal probe on presentation of my passport. Dammit, I want to go home and have some Ted Drewe's frozen custard before they close for the season and get some real damn BBQ that you just can't get anywhere else even though plenty of places on the planet try to fake it. I dream sometimes about a big, thick, juicy porterhouse steak and cornbread. I crave food, folks and fun but, in spite of whatever the US media crackheads have been smoking to report 'the world being safer' thanks to the US military, out here in reality I'm just not sure that my desire to visit home exceeds my desire to not get in the way of some wackos when tensions are clearly on the rise. Perhaps I need to send a telegram to the people of America.

YO, AMERICA, NO ONE GIVES A SHIT ABOUT WHO SERVED WHERE AND WHEN AS DUMBYA HAS ALREADY BEEN PROVEN A LIAR AND HIS RATINGS STILL ARE BETTER THAN KERRYS STOP SHUT UP ABOUT THE FUCKING TYPOGRAPHY AND AUTHENTICITY OF THE STUPID FUCKING NATIONAL GUARD DOCUMENTS ALREADY STOP IT AINT HELPING STOP REALLY STOP PLEASE START ASKING QUESTIONS ABOUT SHIT THAT MATTERS LIKE EDUCATION, ECONOMICS AND MAKING NICE WITH THE REST OF THE WORLD NOW THAT EVERYONE HATES US AND MOST OF US LIVING OUTSIDE THE US PRETEND TO BE CANADIANS WHEN ASKED [EXCEPT IN FINLAND DURING WORLD HOCKEY FINALS] STOP MAYBE TALK ABOUT ALL THE DEAD BODIES OR SOMETHING STOP ANYTHING ASIDE FROM THE COMPLETELY POINTLESS AND UTTERLY AGGRAVATING IDIOTIC EXERCISE IN TRYING TO OUTSNAGGLE THE SPIN MACHINE STOP GEORGIE WAS AN ALCOHOLIC DRUNK DRIVING COKE SNORTING LOSER WHOSE DADDY GOT HIM WHERE HE IS TODAY STOP GET OVER IT AS HE IS AN UPSTANDING CITIZEN COMPARED TO MOST FOLKS THESE DAYS STOP PLEASE SEND CHEEZE-ITS AND CORNDOGS STOP MY HEAD IS GOING TO EXPLODE BEFORE NOVEMBER STOP